When my daughter was 7 months old, I flew alone with her from New York to Burbank. Due to ATC problems, we were stuck on the plane for 3 hours making it an 8-hour flight. There was a tension in the air when passengers saw me sitting with that little package on my lap: “She’s going to cry the whole flight.” or “Where’s the mother?”
Trust me, it was a long flight. There were three bottles of formula, a lot of playing with her, a lot of work. It was successful at the same time: She never cried, never annoyed anyone.
When we arrived in Burbank, people started coming up to me:
“You’re such a good father.”
“You did such an amazing job.”
I just did what I was supposed to do. Mothers don’t receive any praise when they do what they’re supposed to do. Expectations are higher.
Sure, when I compare my parental involvement with that of my father, we’re talking universes apart. And, there’s a lot of talk that dads are more engaged today.
True. Do we deserve credit for it? Not really, we’re just doing what we’re supposed to do. There’s a huge expectation gap for mothers and fathers.
Today is Father’s Day. I will get a lot of hugs and a lot of kisses. It’s great to get accolades for a job you’re supposed to do. But let’s never forget who should get the real praise.
Thank you, moms.
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